Silent But Deadly - The Art Of Getting Information From Others.

Silent But Deadly - The Art Of Getting Information From Others.



Written by Douglas Castle for TAKING COMMAND! and republished by TNNWC Group, LLC. You may join TNNWC by clicking on http://bit.ly/JoinTNNWC .



Dear Friends:



In any social or business situation (the photo in the upper left may be a bit extreme, but it might have helped to get you here), you must get information from other individuals. The technique, as succinctly expressed once by Certified Anger Management Coach Professor Jack Nicholson, is to know precisely "When to keep your pie hole shut." Crude, Jack, but correct.



Most people are uncomfortable with silence and uncertainty -- so much so that they prattle on and on filling the silence with empty chatter to avoid either answering or asking a question, and to alleviate their personal discomfort at the bare intensity of a direct question and answer dialogue without socially soothing smalltalk, or circuitous trivial conversation (i.e., beating around the bush).



If you would like to get high-quality information efficiently, you may always start with some casual conversation of commentary to put the other person at ease, and a bit off guard. But then, when you are ready, and just as the other person's body language indicates a state of relaxation, you must:



1. Make your posture ramrod straight;



2. Look the other individual up and down briefly, and nod your head (two or three times);



3. Ask a direct question. Get to the point. Don't add all sorts of qualifications and explanations. Do it staccato style, while making eye contact with the other individual.



4. Maintain steady eye contact. Maintain silence.



5. Wait.



6. Either wait for the other individual to answer (and don't interrupt), or if the other indivdual is avoiding answering, re-directing the conversation, or looking uncomfortable but not answering, move in closer, intensify the eye contact, wait for them to finish, and pause.



7. Ask the same question again.



8. Most of the time, you will get the information that you need to know.



Remember: You lose your ability to obtain useful information from others by failing to use silence as your deadly weapon of interrogation.



It takes time, but you must become used to the idea of asking direct questions, making unwavering contact, and putting the other person on the spot by remaining silent and determined. Master yourself. Learn to be comfortable in the silence while you wait for answers.



Intense? Yes.

Socially awkward? Yes.

Effective? YES!



Faithfully,



Douglas Castle

http://takingcommand.blogspot.com/

http://www.douglascastleblogosphere.com/





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